HOLY SHIT THE STAR WARS BOOK AFTER INVINCIBLE SOUNDS AMAZING

- Han+Leia+Allana happy family adventures
- Origins of the Millenium Falcon
- A stand-alone
- James Luceno, the man who wrote the only good duology in the NJO

( Teaser/publisher summary )

I don't even care about LotF anymore; a WHOLE BOOK ABOUT THE MILLENIUM FALCON almost sounds too awesome to be true.

Temporarily unlocking all my Legacy comics pimping.

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=XC7JSLRP

STAR WARS IS PROFOUNDLY DISAPPOINTING

DETAILS AFTER EXAM

CHINGADA!!!1!

HOLY FUCK

BEST SW SPOILERS EVER

( Boba and ___ sitting in a tree... )

WHAT THE HELL, KAREN TRAVISS. YOU ARE EPIC WIN OR EPIC FAIL AND I CAN'T DECIDE WHICH

RELEVANT EXCERPTS FROM DARTH_LEX AT TFN

( I always feel really bad for liking Jag as a character... )

And then, just because I found it lulzy:

( Jaina! Show-down! )

Okay, so I bought Jedi vs. Sith and let me tell you, this book is like “all the crap I never bothered to read about before 101,” which is nice. Also, it has pretty pictures. Neat.

Anyway, the best part of this book is definitely Palpatine monologuing. Uh, the only background you need to know is that he’s speaking from a Holocron, which is like a triangle full of dark side info, which makes Palpatine the Microsoft Paperclip of Evil, speaking from a cloned body from beyond the grave after RotJ.

And so I typed up the best/lulziest/creepiest bits.

( SOMETHING SOMETHING DARK SIDE SOMETHING SOMETHING COMPLETE. )

Make sure you read with Ian McDiarmand's voice in your head. ♥

1) Some middle schoolers acting out Young Jedi Knights. Note Tenel Ka's sparkly rainbow wig and Zekk's afro.

2) Jedi vs. Sith illustrated guide. Samples, samples, and more samples. Holy crap, this art is GORGEOUS. Luke has never made decapitation look hotter.

Random House has this feature where you can preview Fury... and, also, where you can search for words and it will show you where they show up in the book. I've got a few things strung together. ♥

***

He tried to make his voice calm, mature. “I did my homework, you know.” Luke blinked several times in succession. He did not look confused, but Ben knew, and he took a little uncharitable delight in the fact, that his words had baffled his father. Luke turned toward him. “What homework?”

“The assignment you and mom gave me just before I went off to Almania.”

Luke shook his head. “I’m glad you did it. But I don’t understand what you’re saying.”

“It was about my grandfather. Anakin Skywalker. How he got to be Darth Vader. The Emperor did horrible things to him. Made him suspicious of his friends so they wouldn’t be friends anymore. Made him kill younglings so no one would ever trust him again. Made him alone . Made it so nobody else in the universe understood him… except the Emperor. I bet, just before he became Darth Vader, he probably hated the Emperor. But the Emperor had worked it out so that he was the only one Anakin Skywalker had.” Luke considered, then nodded.

To steal Gizmodo's tagline: Multitalented Darth Vader Has a Hoedown With Luke Using Advanced Music-Making Device.

Traitor clip. Context: Jacen is taking a break from tentacle torture and his captor is chatting him up.

( 'Everything I Tell You Is A Lie.' )

This journal is filling up with totally useless odds and ends...

Anakin: "I never claimed to be the Chosen One. That was Qui-Gon. Even the Council doesn't believe it anymore, so why should you?"
Obi-Wan: "Because I think you believe it. I think you know in your heart that you're meant for something extraordinary."
Anakin: "And you, Master. What does your heart tell you you're meant for?"
Obi-Wan: "Infinite sadness."

-- Labyrinth of Evil

Today I learned that Luke and Leia are camper-appable after Splinter of the Mind’s Eye. However, upon rereading Splinter, which was written in 1978 and has enough Luke/Leia to “be considered in appropriate in most countries,” I… wow, yeah, that would be pretty epic.

However, reading this book did bring the lulz -- from “vader is the cancer that is killing /tatooine/” to Leia’s voice being a “steel kitten” – so here’s some choice experts from My Happy Adventures In Splinter of the Mind’s Eye.

(  We could find ourselves marooned forever on this empty world, without companionship, without knowledge tapes, without... without lubricants! )

Tidbits from people's summaries of the new YA book, "The Darth Vader Saga." Uh. I don't even know whether to say these are spoilers because they're from A New Hope but SPOILER ALERT just in case.

- Vader specifically orders the deaths of Owen & Beru, after being well aware of who they are. He even throws out a classic Vader-quip, when speaking to the stormtrooper commander via comlink: "Tell the Lars that they seem to have trouble keeping protocol droids on their property." Heh. Vader also makes specific point to keep the holofeed open so he can watch their deaths, thinking that they'll finally pay for their weakness (tying to the AotC section, where Anakin, after returning with Shmi's body, looks on the Lars as weak and pathetic for not being able to save her).

- The scene of Vader torturing Leia is in there; Vader drugs her and pretends to be a rebel sent by her father (Bail). Leads to some great lines like Leia's groggy "Father?" directed towards Vader, and Vader's "Your father is ordering you to tell us where the plans are." Heh, if he only knew how right he was ...

Mostly the first one is sad and the second one is hilariously "Vader Sessions."

Changes In Play Following Inferno

As I mentioned in Excel’s post the other night, I like to update my characters as their stories go along whenever possible. For Ben, this means updates every three months or so, as Allston, Traviss, and Denning put out more books, and today this means making some of the following changes for Inferno:

- Re: Luke. The “he needed to be with his father” bit from Sacrifice expanded a lot in Inferno. To make a long story short, Ben haet Jacen, Ben loev dad now, which tips into...
- Re: Jacen. lol haet Jacen.
- Re: Jaina. Excellent, I was right here. There don’t seem to be awkward hard feelings about stabbing Zekk.
- Re: “what you’ll pick up if you’re a psychic.” Ben is going a bit dark/has hit Solowalker puberty. I sincerely doubt that this will be relevant unless he picks fights and has a reason to start radiating hate/anger/bloodlust again. Also? Ben is an amazing liar. He can lie, and he can stop you from psychic-ing him out. Which is good, because sometimes he needs to cover up what a cold-blooded sneaky bastard of a gray Jedi he’s being.

( A Summary of Inferno, Cut for Length and Spoilers. )

1) Ben is not Darth Krayt! Fuck yeah!

2) orz Cade.

- Pre-LotF (?), Luke and Ben.
- Jacen Solo + Anakin Skywalker.
- Ben + Vong.